Max’s Christmas 2021 Blog

Max’s Christmas 2021 Blog

“Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art” – Stansilav Jerzy Lec.

It’s been a while since I last wrote, and Max’s Christmas Blog is here! Time waits for no man, or in my case, Chief Happiness Officer. I am now officially a senior dog. How can that be? It is true, I am living a very rich and full life, but I am also blessed with being surrounded by my personal human servants who cater for my every whim. I mean, senior dogs cannot have any stress in their lives can they? It seems like 5 minutes ago when I was burning the candle at both ends, and my adventures with Sid the Sausage dog and Bessie.. ah Bessie….

Max’s Big Nights Out And Two Day’s Recovery

Nowadays, a big night for me means 2 recovery days! How did that happen? Having said that, I am not alone in needing extended recovery periods. My mum recently went to a Christmas party and my word.. let’s just say she needed those two days also to recover from the Margheritas that were flowing that night. If only Nan and Pop knew she had a penchant for Margheritas – best left unsaid I think.

One thing that hasn’t changed for me since I was a mere pup, is my dislike of thunderstorms. I do have a great coping strategy now though, and the gap between the two lounges make a great storm haven. Which reminds me, my nan and pop had the audacity to leave me alone in my humble abode the other day when a storm struck. I tried to remain brave, but my botty burps probably would have given the game away if anyone else was at home. Ewwww, storm induced botty burps are not the most pleasant! Anyway, they arrived back home after about an hour and I just had to tell them off for leaving me alone. I made my thoughts very clear that I was not impressed and each got a personal dressing down from me. They got it!

Max Is Now A Senior Dog

Now, where was I…? Ah yes, my senior dog status… see, my memory does let me down now and again – it’s an occupational hazard I guess. One thing I have noticed recently, is my skin is not as plump and supple as it once was. Yes, I still love my tummy rubs, but something’s changed. It’s not as elastic as it once was, but my mum did tell me that she can help with this. She has some amazing treatments given by her wonderful team, and incidentally, my other human servants, at Le Sands Clinic. They can do wonders for ageing skin, and have told me they have a range of wonderful skin boosters that will help me. I mean, as Chief Happiness Officer, I have to look my total best at ALL times. I have a confession to make – and please don’t tell everyone. Although I am a vitally important member of my mum’s team, and provide great happiness to my many adoring fans, I haven’t been into work for ages. I mean, I was busy at the start of the year, then lockdown came, and now… I need to spend time just being seriously cute for my nan and pop! Which reminds, me, with the Summer holidays coming, I think I need to see my personal hair stylist too. I mean, if I sneeze, my hair just drops over my eyes and I can’t see a thing. It is so annoying. Besides, the absolute panic induced with me sneezing, from those around me, and thinking I have Omicron is pretty embarrassing. Also, with the with the Summer heat, I definitely don’t need the equivalent of 3 winter jumpers on and looking 4 times my normal size with all that fluffy white stuff. Life can be tough sometimes!

How Can Over Eating Be A Thing?

As we head into the season of over eating and drinking – pffft.. how can you ever over eat I ask you? Oh yes, as we head into that season, don’t forget to hydrate well, drinking plenty of water, and make sure you apply sun block and limit direct exposure to the sun.. I wouldn’t want you to get burnt and not be able to pamper me now would I?

Merry Christmas and A Happy New year to all of you, my adoring fans and happiness lovers. I hope you’ve enjoyed Max’s Christmas Blog 2021

Love to you, my adoring humans

MAX xx

Max’s Blog. Sid, Blossom and Bessie. My Tattoo Regret

Sheepish MaxOne night, I went out with the boys including Sid the Sausage dog. Now he’s a bad boy! My mum, even told me to stay away from him as he is a bad influence on me. Well, back to the night out with the boys, it was ONE of those nights. I’m sure that Sid spiked my chicken! Well, the effect of spiked chicken on a cute little white fluff ball like me can be enormous. That night, it didn’t fail to live up to expectations and we ended up, as boys do, at the local tattoo parlour. The night was only going to go one way from here, and that’s badly.

The repercussions

In the morning, my mum, Dr Saliba was not happy. I was grounded big time. I mean when you’re only 10 centimetres from the ground under normal circumstances, and all of a sudden, I am totally grounded, well, that’s a massive problem for me. How was I to guard my nan’s house? Ah, I forgot that my time as Chief Security Officer also was not that successful (long story) (read my bio),  but you get the gist of things. You just can’t keep a lovable superstar like me down for THAT long!.

The Regret

Back to the story of my big night out and that tattoo. I am also regretting that night because I don’t know who “Blossom” is and Blossom’s name was now adorned on my cute pink belly. This was also very bad too as I have my eye not on Blossom, but rather on a socially upward mobile little poodle, “Bessie!” . Ah…. Bessie! She’s a pooch’s dream. Now she’s a classy lady. I’ve heard some say that Bessie is so classy, she has to bathe in goats milk every day, has her nails polished by the house cat, bomber, and only eats prime beef, with a French dressing on. Makes my chicken desires somewhat downmarket! Back to the story! How could I let her see me with Blossom emblazoned on me?

Overcoming Tattoo Regret

If, like me, you have tattoo regret and want to remove “Blossom” before Bessie finds out, you need to see my mum. Her Le Sands Clinic, (btw, have I mentioned my aversion to medical establishments and vets especially, as they stick things where I don’t want things to be stuck!). Well, it has state of the art tattoo removal technologies that can help me remove Blossom in double quick time. Being Chief Happiness Officer, I do get a staff discount, but even mere humans can take advantage of Dr Saliba’s brilliant technology and at very special prices, and remove that ink that you are now regretful over. And before Bessie finds out!